The Living Years

31 years ago, today, my father passed away. 2 years later, Mike + The Mechanics released, a song that has forever epitomized my feelings.

This year, is slightly different. Depending on your personal spiritual perspectives on life, and death.

This will be the first anniversary that my parents are spending together.

I don’t know if this is good or bad.

If you believe that death brings restoration, then it will be the first time since long before I was born, that my parents have been, as they were on their wedding day.

I prefer to believe that death brings healing, and this can be the beginning of them to be back in happiness.

That the challenges that my father and I endured from my mother’s illness are behind them.

That the pain that led my father to drink is healed.

And that the pain that led my father to attempt to take his own life are healed.

These are the imperfect thoughts on the crumbled bits of paper laying on the floor of my mind.

The most valuable lesson from the song…

Say it loud, Say it clear.
You can listen as well as you hear.
It’s too late, when we die.
To admit we don’t see eye to eye.

The bitterness of the conversations that we never got to have really does last. Try not to have crumbled bits of paper filled with imperfect thoughts rolling around on the floor of your mind.

Joseph Alex Martin is a Copeland Center-certified Mental Health Recovery including Wellness Recovery Action Plan (WRAP) Advanced Level Co-Facilitator. Joseph began utilizing his own WRAP in 2008 following his certification as a Peer Support Specialist. Joseph was a Certified Peer Support Specialist in Pennsylvania for 9 1/2 years, and is now living in New Jersey and working in New York. In his role as a Certified Peer Support Specialist, Joseph supports the recovery of his peers in their plans to take action to recover wellness in their lives.